Grateful

Is it better if I wouldn’t have ever married you?
Remained a single mom to just the one…
Save me of the pain and emptiness that has invaded my soul…
Prevent me from ever knowing what a man of integrity looks like…
Or have a man who treasures  his wife…
A man who put her first and love her as Christ loved the church…
I wouldn’t have ever known how to nurture my marriage…
My eyes wouldn’t witnessed a man willing to grow as a husband and father…
Or see a man who works hard in order to provide for his family…
I wouldn’t have ever known the definition of a father…
And understand his deep love for his children…
Or desire to protect them in every way possible…
So the emptiness is necessary and the pain is a reflection of our union and connection developing but cut off by the inevitable…
Although to some degree I feel like you are right beside me talking me along the way, my heart yearns to touch you, hear your voice again…
I wish our love story was written in such a way that we were able to grow so old together our canes laid side by side…
Together we’d watch each girl reach their milestone and celebrate their accomplishments…
I wonder can you see them or are you in such awe as you sit at the feet of our Savior…
Our legacy of love forever remain…
I am grateful to be called your wife…
To shared our love and see the reflection of it through our 3 jewels…
Wish we would have celebrated our last time the way we celebrated our first…
Our last time we danced as the first Mr. and Mrs…
Our last time we walked hand in hand as husband and wife…
Our last time we sat at our special park where you first asked me to married you…
Meeting you was a gift…
A pathway into God’s plan for both our lives…

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